I keep you tucked away in dark corners of my mind because sometimes feeling becomes too much. It clings and hovers around me, weighing me down. A cement slab.
I sleep there sometimes
After all it’s what I deserve. The light is an unwelcome guest permeating my lids. I crack them open only to wince and close them tightly again.
I live there sometimes
My bed made of stone and cement, losing all perception of time. Squandering it away in a prison with unlocked doors.
I long for it sometimes
Accepting every evil expelled upon me in that bed. I willingly bound myself to it. A craving to just be wanted, just feel something.
I loathe it sometimes
Half a lifetime to realize I alone was to blame , and I have no recollection of when it came to be. I only know that when the time came I was finished doing what I was told.
I opened my eyes., I loosened the ropes, and let the light in.